More Obama Electioneering

So I have this buddy who is a die-hard Republican; a swell fellow, the only friend I’ve made since moving to Christmas Island, and a real boy scout to boot. Many times he has been the Jiminy Cricket to my Pinocchio, if you know what I mean. He’s just good people.

Sadly, however, he is woefully confused where it comes to politics. And he cares about his politics with the same zeal and verbosity with which I care about mine.

So it was with some trepidation the other day when I read his email announcing his endorsement of Mitt Romney. He had actually been sniffing around Obama’s skirt there for a while, but I figured he’d stick with the party in the end. But Romney??

Anyhow, I wrote him back with an impassioned plea to re-think his position, which communiqué I am reproducing below. The Last Boy Scout’s parts will be indented, an old blogger trick I just recently learned:

I am now supporting Mitt Romney for president, even though I have some serious issues with him. I was having trouble with McCain because of some of the ridiculous legislation he has sponsored in the past, and two things pushed me over the edge today: Schwarzenegger endorsed McCain, and George Will blasted McCain (and backed up his argument nicely).

George Will always backs up his argument nicely. He could make having shit thrown at you sound like a walk in a park on a spring day in May. I love George Will. I’m glad I didn’t read his apparent endorsement of the Mittster.

I was THIS CLOSE to just saying "screw it" and supporting Obama,

don’t think twice, it’s alright...

because I think his charisma could actually bring Americans together for more rational discussions of public policies, but two things kept me from doing so: 1. He wants to bring us all together in support of liberal policies that I completely disagree with, so it would be counterproductive to the country; 2. I'm convinced that after a few months, the honeymoon period will be over for whatever president we elect, so my only reason for supporting Obama would be obsolete before we sing Auld Lang Syne in 2009.

Wow. Very pragmatic! I like that. You led with your heart till crunch time, then your brain elbowed its way in and said, “Hold on. I’m taking over here.” I agree with you about any potential honeymoon period. I’d decline to vote for Hillary in the primaries (if I could’ve) because of how much she’d energize your ‘base.’ I think there’s more people who’d vote against Hillary than vote against a black man. And in the long term, that doesn’t bode well for a Hillary presidency getting anything done other than defending itself from attack, either. Plus it would give Bill the limelight to keep getting mad in public and fucking things up.

Usually, I pick my candidate on day one, so this is a very late decision for me. And just for the record, I'm still open to switching allegiance if a true conservative comes out of the woodwork and jumps into the campaign, and if it comes down to McCain vs. Obama, it might be a voting-booth decision, since their policies would be difficult to distinguish anyway. Could depend on their veep choices. McCain vs. Clinton is a different story -- their policies are similar, their personalities are similar, but nothing -- NOTHING -- will keep me away from the polls if I have a chance to cast a vote to end Hillary's political career.

Well, goodie for you. :-) I tell you what, I’m really glad that – for a change – there’s nobody on the GOP side I hate as much as you hate Hillary. There usually is. The “Over My Dead Body” candidate. (W has been that twice now, to my impotent embarrassment.)

Personally, I’m glad you don’t have anybody better to vote for than Rom, the Space Knight (an actual Marvel Comics character from the 70s – he was a machine person… ahem). A lot of Romney’s social-agenda votes are pretty loosey-goosey in the way me and my fellow Commie-libs like. Buuut... I think he’s kinda squeaky in the ethics department. He totally changes his opinions on major issues to go with the contemporary flow. If the Mitt Romney who ran for the governor of Massachusetts met the Mitt Romney who’s running for president, they’d probably get in a slap fight, both of them weeping and demanding that the other apologize. How many times has he demanded to the cameras that McCain “apologize” for this slight or that distortion? If the nightly comedy shows had writing staffs, we’d have montages on YouTube already. My feeling is, we don’t need two pussy presidents (and their attendant ‘personal issues’) in a row.

That said, I think ol’ Rom would probably govern in a way that pissed me off less than McCain would, but it would break my heart to see this great, principled warrior John McCain go down to defeat to that flip-flopping fuck from Richie Ricvhille, Taxachussetts. I mean, seriously, Romney looks like he belongs on a dollar bill already; it’s ridiculous.

That having been said, I also think McCain is much easier to beat in the general, especially in the unlikely event that Obama gets the nod. Can you imagine the debates if Obama and McCain get the noms? Shit, even The Missus said she would watch. Even my doctor, who counts her days, consciously, as one less day left in the Bush presidency, says that she respects McCain for “having all the wrong positions for the right reasons.”

Anyhow, I can see why you’re going with Romney in the primary, but face it – if he wins and goes on to purchase the presidency, he’ll be a caretaker president, probably even if some horrible attack occurs on his watch – because we’ll blame that on Bush and Iraq anyhow.

But if you get the opportunity to throw it all out there on election day and don’t pull the lever for Obama, and he wins, you’ll know you could have been involved in a potentially transforming event in American politics, and you let it slip through your fingers.