Mittens pulls off a big win!

Who knew? Put him on stage with a fellow Ivy Leaguer—instead of the traveling clown car that was the GOP primary field, or plopped down in the middle of a rally of Joe Six-packers—and on style and points, I’d give last night’s debate squarely to Mr. Romney.

Obama himmed and hawed as he tried to break down complicated policy issues with thousands of moving parts into digestible sound bytes, with the result being that he looked like he was not in command of the facts. Romney, on the other hand, skimmed over the surface of the facts and went straight to the sound bytes which he delivered with deadly precision. Obama may be the Constitutional law professor, but Romney seemed like he must have been the debate team champ. Decision: Romney.

Body language also did Obama in. Romney looked like he was posing for a portrait for the $10,000 bill, while Obama was fairly slouchy and scowly throughout. And when Obama scowls and lowers his head, his eyes go into the shadows, giving him the countenance of a cartoon villain. Decision: Romney.

They both walked all over Jim Lehrer and the established format of the event. Split decision.

On the facts: I’m sure mcnbc will spend the next week deconstructing all the primary campaign pledges Romney reversed himself on last night; all the ways his words bore no resemblance to anything he’s said or done in the past, or is likely to do in the future; all the ways he twisted the truth up in knots and just flat-out prevaricated… but none of that matters.

Because debates are a snapshot, and if you happen to take a picture of mom and dad while they’re visiting and somebody is flashing her boobs in the background, you’re gonna remember that snapshot, not that you and mom fought the whole time while dad just got drunker… you’re gonna remember the snapshot moment with the awesome, unexpected boobies.

Mitt Romney was the pair of awesome, unexpected boobies last night that his campaign needed.

Far be it from me to give the President of the United States public-performance advice (I’ll be the only left-winger who doesn’t, I’m sure), but as far as content, I feel somewhat qualified.

Romney repeatedly swore that his health care cuts would not affect “this generation of seniors.” This is an obvious attempt to shore up this cycle’s senior vote, but it ignores the fact that most Americans are not seniors, and we will be affected by the implementation of VoucherCare down the road.

Is the Republican calculation that Americans are too stupid to see that we are the next generation for whom Romney plans to play three-card-monty with our retirement health care; or that the current crop of retirees are all just like Mr. Romney, in that they want theirs, Jack, and everybody else can go get their own? 

If it is the latter, it ignores the fact that most of those old people have kids, and grandkids, and some helpful left-wing super-PAC needs to put up an ad pointing out that if Grandma and Grandpa buy into the Romney plan, they’ll be ensuring their own future at the expense of their grandkids’ future. Romney has said as much, and this has been the one talking point he hasn’t bounced all over the place on in the last year, depending upon which audience he was addressing.

It’s a huge tactical and rhetorical chink in Romney’s vaguely-proposed plan, but nobody is picking up and running with it, even Obama. Old people don’t like it when you go after their grandkids with a meat axe; somebody needs to put the Romney/Ryan health care plan in that appalling—and accurate—context.

As one of the ‘next generation of seniors’ that Romney plans to leave to fend for ourselves, I am not impressed. I actually feel rather vulnerable, and was hoping someone on that stage last night would point out that Romney was suggesting we give one generation of extremely active voters a break, then take it out on every generation of inattentive voters that follow.

But Obama stuck to his notes and his talking points and never once took it to Romney; it looked like he was in one debate and Romney in another. And as a lot of people pointed out, it looked like Romney wanted to be there and Obama didn’t.

Romney’s casual-at-best acquaintance with compassion and policy consistency aside, a debate is all about perception (as I had to keep reminding an increasingly glum Missus last night), and my perception was that Romney walked away with this one, whistling a happy tune.

Decision: (ugh) Romney.